Goodbye. I Will Not Be Returning To This Forum.

[ABBY W.]

It's too bad she is not able to ignore the things she finds offensive and keep the useful parts of what is given.

 

[Claire D]

I'm curious - why are people even bothering to post to this thread if the OP is not coming back?

Peggy is quite right when she says:

If she doesn't want to be here, then don't be here. If she does, she does. <shrugs>

I'm assuming the "announcement" was for dramatic affect.

 

[Essentia]

Because we all know better. And we like drama.

 

[AZChins]

Claire - probably are posting because it's so strange that someone would start this thread? I don't know... People love drama?

 

[Mt. Zion Chins]

I believe people are posting hopeing that she will at least read this thread that she started

 

[mishellyshel]

because some of us are optimists and hope she will read and have a change of heart.

i only like drama when it is NOT mine!

 

[ABBY W.]

OK, so part of my post was deleted, and I'm not sure why....

But, yes, I think people are posting in hopes that the OP will read it and have a change of heart.

 

[Marie5656]

I have found from past experience on forums that those who post a rather dramatic good bye thread, and say do not bother responding because I am not coming back, they will often come back to lurk and see what folks are saying.
That being said...I found this forum 4 years into being a chin owner, and have found that I have still learned a lot. Some of my new knowledge I will never need (like about breeding), but I still find the place pretty informative.

I have at times had words with folks on forums , but I have learned to ignore them if they try to bait me.

 

[tunes]

OK, so part of my post was deleted, and I'm not sure why....

Because, frankly, I'm sick to death of hearing what your post said. Nobody wants to hear about how mean people are, blah, blah, ad nauseum.

Here's how it works. This is a forum with 3000+ members. Can you put 3000 people in a room together and insure that they get along at all times with every subject and every situation? Of course you can't and you're delusional if you think you can.

Someone always gets their panties in a twist because they think someone didn't properly address them. Guess what? Get over it. Selling items that are unsafe for the animals they are being sold for is supposed to be what we're about here -- making sure that doesn't happen. It's not always going to be rainbows and butterflies and niceness. Welcome to life.

 

[starleomach]

I am 99.9% sure the OP will come back to read.....they always do and someday they will re-register under a different name.. again they always do

 

[ABBY W.]

OK, so this forum is supposed to be about freely expressing our ideas, right? So is it right to delete my post because you didn't like what I said? I would understand if I had said something inappropriate, but all I said was, people should make an attempt to communicate their message in a way that it is more likely to be heard.

If you honestly express disagreement with someone, in a way that is kind and respectful, they may hear you and re-think what they're doing, maybe they won't. But if you attack them and put them on the defensive, there is ZERO chance of them hearing you. They don't think about what was said because they are too busy thinking about HOW it was said. It's not about rainbows and butterflies, it's about effective communication. If what we are trying to accomplish is bettering the chinchilla world, and helping people learn, then we should be concerned with how to communicate effectively.

I am not saying I expect everyone to get along all the time. Obviously, that isn't realistic. But I think it is reasonable to expect people to treat each other with respect and kindness, even when there is disagreement.

 

[Laurie]

Often time people post on a thread and it is not in regards to the original poster. I've seen a zillion threads, mostly in breeding and babies, where members will address another poster on the thread and not to the original poster. While it is quite true our original poster may not read what was posted there might some people who feel the same as the poster and they want to see what others have to say.

Quite honestly constructive criticism is very hard for people to take. But it is just that--constructive. When you do something wrong if you are not taught it is wrong you will continue to do so over and over again. As humans, we find it very difficult to ever believe we are wrong, so instead of saying--thanks for helping me with that, or sorry I was wrong about this, we generally get on the defensive and get bent out of shape. I honestly believe no one wakes up in the morning and goes "today I hope to piss off everyone I talk too" yet because we are humans you're are going to be not only the person to piss off someone but also get pissed on by someone. It's just life--and what is life after all? Why, the greatest learning tool there is!

 

[tunes]

I deleted it to stop just this from happening - an argument that has been done over and over and over and over and over and over..........I'm sure you get the point. It has nothing to do with this thread or this poster. It has to do with an argument you want to start that I'm not going to let start. See? Even now, you continue with it, after your post has been deleted and it's been explained to you clearly that it's not going to happen.

You weren't freely expressing your ideas. You were complaining because you think people aren't nice enough. Not every situation deserves nice, and not every single day is going to be filled with marshmallows and happy thoughts.

Did you bother to go back and read what the OP was whining about? She was selling unsafe cages for animals that should not be in them and unsafe products for chins. She was told to stop self-policing and she was told to stop spam posting. Before you jump in with both feet, you might at least try and figure out what the issue is about next time first.

ETA - Actually, it was a lapse in judgment that I even allowed this thread to stand. I should have just shut it down after the OP had her tantrum and left. The majority of the folks who post on this forum are great and willing to help out. The people who are going to whine, are always going to whine, no matter where they go. I'm not going to let this evolve into a 30 page argument about how people are mean, so I'm just going to shut it down.