Did I Screw Up, or is She an Idiot?

[3CsMommy]

I took in a couple of stray kittens last month, and now that they're vetted, it's time for homes. I was thrilled when a coworker of a friend showed interest in the torti female, and we started emailing back and forth about the cat, her health, and setting up a meeting.

Through everything, though, most of my questions about her cats care (like if they are declawed or fixed) went unanswered. Today I got an email: she's backing out because she "wanted to bring her into a loving home, but the adoption process turned out to be more complicated than I had expected. I didn’t know that I would need to disclose the medical history of my kittens and how I care for them. I understand that you are looking out for [the kittens], which is not a problem… I just didn’t think I would need to go into all of this detail in order to adopt her."

The "disclosure" I asked for:
"Who is your vet?
Do you already use preventatives with your kids (Advantage, Heartguard, etc.)?
Are either of yours declawed or not yet fixed (because until she gains another pound or so, she's probably not quite ready for that, even though she's 6 mo. old. I haven't seen sign of her going into heat yet, so it may have been suppressed when she was sick. )
Do you have some kind of "back up" plan in the event you can't keep your critters? (If not, my parent's phone number is on her medical records from Dr. XXXX; if something happens, I'd want her to come back to me, or go to Steve, unless your fur kids have a "godmother" or something.)"

Is that asking too much, considering I had no plans of asking an adoption fee and offered her the basement here as an introduction place for her two other cats and the kitten I have? I come from an animal rescue background and these are pretty standard questions from any organization that would adopt out kittens. Most of them get *a lot* more detailed than that.

Too complicated? Something strikes me as fishy...

 

[mishellyshel]

When I adopted my chin Zucca, I had to fill out a lengthy form. I was happy that the Rescue cared that much about their pets to make sure they were going to good homes.
Sometimes people are strange and they feel you are questioning their ability to care.
I also have learned in life that when dealing with certain things with friends & family there are always "complications"! Some times it is easier to deal with a stranger!! lol

 

[EnslavedByNinjas]

I don't think she's an idiot, or you screwed up... I think she probably just was surprised. Explain to her why you're asking these things, and that they are standard questions you learned in your background in animal rescue. Perhaps if she knew that it was a shorter list of questions than an adoption agency would give, that would change things in her opinion?

If it doesn't, I'd find the little one a different new home.

 

[Riven]

She says right there that she knows it's for the kittens own good, and still doesn't want to answer the questions. If you have nothing to hide then why hide it? Skirting a question is usually a sign that she doesn't have an answer or doesn't want to answer it ( usually a sign in rescue work that they don't think you'll like the answer).

If I was getting a pet I'd think nothing of asking questions, crap a lot of rescues do in home interviews and call your vet to make sure they have records with them of you vetting your animals.

I'm currently working on getting some geese from a lady and I've offered to send her photos or whatever she wants to know because she lives about 3 hours away, she just wants to make sure they go to a good home. I have no problems with it because I don't have anything to hide. If she thinks I won't be a good home for the geese ( which I'm paying pretty well for as well ) then I'll ask her what I need for them to be safe and happy, that's what good owners do. I've never had geese before so I'm willing to learn!

Don't worry about it, and don't question yourself! At the end of the night you are the one who has to sleep with what you've done, so you shouldn't have to be worrying if a kitten you spent so much time fixing up is in a good home or not!

 

[nicky]

I think that she's probably hiding something- like she doesn't have a vet for her cats. I can't see why else she wouldn't feel comfortable answering such a simple question. Unless, maybe she felt funny because you two work together and she may have thought "What? She doesn't think that I'll take care of her or something?" Some people get over defensive and think like that I think. But, more than likely she just doesn't have a vet. I'd ask her nicely why she feels this way and eplain that it's the standard thing to do when trying to find an animal a good home. If she's not hiding anything than she may change her mind, but if there's something funny I bet 10:1 she still won't answer the questions.

 

[CerLynn]

I agree. If I genuinely feel that I'm well-prepared to take care of an animal, I'm more than happy to do what's needed to show it. She's probably got some answers she thinks/knows you won't like.

 

[greychins]

I'm thinking she's hiding something as well. I hardly think those questions are "complicated." When I first got into chins and was thinking of adopting some, some questionnaires were waaaay more complicated than that, and some I could see people saying "ok, forget it." But the questions you asked I think are normal, everyday questions. I don't think yours are complicated at all.

I would think that it's probably likely that she either doesn't use any flea/tick/heartworm preventative, doesn't vet the cats, possibly doesn't have them spayed/neutered... and maybe she thinks that's fine for her, but she knows that other people--especially people adopting out potential pets--look down upon that.

I had a dog that I adopted out awhile back, and I had someone who seemed like a great potential adopter, but as my dog was not neutered, I said that I would not adopt him out to a family that had an un-spayed female dog. The "great potential adopter" seemed great and told me all about her life, kids, other pets, dog, and so on, but kept skirting the issue of whether her dog was male/female/spayed/neutered. She would answer everything else I asked her, but not that... finally I called her out on it, and she told me something along the lines of, "oh I have a female dog, and she's not spayed, and I knew you wouldn't like that, and I know you said you wouldn't adopt him to a family with an unspayed female, but I just thought that they could have one litter and then I'd get one of them fixed." Needless to say, he didn't go to that home. But it really seems like a similar situation here... if she doesn't want to answer those simple questions, then I think there's something she doesn't want to fess up on.

I, personally, would have no problem answering any of those questions... about any of my pets... My animals are spayed/neutered, up to date on shots and flea/tick/heartworm prevention, and so on and so forth... if there's nothing to hide, then why not just answer?

 

[Tiatrack]

The "disclosure" I asked for:
"Who is your vet?
Do you already use preventatives with your kids (Advantage, Heartguard, etc.)?
Are either of yours declawed or not yet fixed (because until she gains another pound or so, she's probably not quite ready for that, even though she's 6 mo. old. I haven't seen sign of her going into heat yet, so it may have been suppressed when she was sick. )
Do you have some kind of "back up" plan in the event you can't keep your critters? (If not, my parent's phone number is on her medical records from Dr. XXXX; if something happens, I'd want her to come back to me, or go to Steve, unless your fur kids have a "godmother" or something.)"

While I don't think these are unreasonable, it might have just scared her if she couldn't give the "right" answer. I think I'm a great cat owner, and my cat doesn't get any preventive meds. I'm confident in my response that I would tell you that, but she might be frightened away. My cat is 100% indoors (per adoption policy), so he doesn't need flea meds or heartguard.

I do think the back-up plan question is pretty personal too. I understand the purpose, but I think it could be worded more friendly...i.e. "While I encourage you to think about who would take Fluffy if something happened to you, I want to let you know Fluffy is always welcome back with me."

 

[3CsMommy]

Thanks, everyone, for the input. After I posted here, I replied to her by email that I'm sorry she'd decided against the adoption and explained that I didn't intend to pry into her personal life, but that there aren't many organizations that would be any less concerned about such things than I was, and wished her luck in her cat search.

I then got an email back that she was going to have a hard time telling her fiancee how she came home with a 3rd cat because he didn't really want another one in the first place.

So, not only does she have them declawed (which our mutual friend heard her mention the other day), but she was planning up until today's email to just bring the cat home and force her on her fiancee. I specified on the poster that they would only go to indoor homes that would fix and NOT declaw. From the sounds of things, she was purposely ducking the question from the start.

Honestly, I think I dodged a bullet with this one. And luckily, since I don't work with her and I won't even live in this state after this weekend, I'll never have to think about her again.

So, anybody want to provide a loving, indoor, claws welcome home for a little tortishell cat?

 

[mishellyshel]

i am not a huge cat person, so i dont know much about them. what is a tortishell cat?

 

[Alicia4435]

Torti shell cats are another name for Calico. I've always wanted another Calico. They are by far my fave cats along with ragdolls. I really hope you find her a great home.

 

[Essentia]

Tortishell is a type of calico, but their markings are different.

Tortishell

Regular ol' Calico

Hopefully I'm not wrong on this, though I could be. This is just how it was always explained to me.

 

[3CsMommy]

That is the cat in question, now named Tie Die, or just Tie. Tortoiseshell marking is caused by a cat getting calico genes from one parent and a solid color (in Tie's case, black) from the other, so they'll show at least 3 colors of fur including orange, white or cream, black, brown and sometimes gray. Tie is mostly black, but has speckles of orange, a couple of cream spots, a teeny white "bikini" on her belly, and a gray spot at the end of her tail. She also has, besides that striking smudge down her nose, 1 orange toe with a pink pad. Now that their burns have healed, the rest of her toes are black.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/29520195@N08/3404809400/in/set-72157616212394684/
This cat probably got calico + brown tiger, so she still has the stripes. I've heard these called Torbico, but only by some very... involved cat breeders.

 

[mishellyshel]

i always said if i was going to get a cat it would be a calico. all of those kitties are gorgerous, especially those eyes. i hope you find good homes for the kittens.

 

[Alicia4435]

Tortishell is a type of calico, but their markings are different.

Tortishell

Regular ol' Calico

Hopefully I'm not wrong on this, though I could be. This is just how it was always explained to me.

LOL, thanks for clearing that up, thats what I meant to say. There are actually a few different versions of Calicos based on the combination of coloring, such as dalute calico, Tortishell, and the average calico. My faves are Tortishells, but I think all of them are beautiful.

 

[minrex]

That is the cat in question, now named Tie Die, or just Tie. Tortoiseshell marking is caused by a cat getting calico genes from one parent and a solid color (in Tie's case, black) from the other, so they'll show at least 3 colors of fur including orange, white or cream, black, brown and sometimes gray. Tie is mostly black, but has speckles of orange, a couple of cream spots, a teeny white "bikini" on her belly, and a gray spot at the end of her tail. She also has, besides that striking smudge down her nose, 1 orange toe with a pink pad. Now that their burns have healed, the rest of her toes are black.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/29520195@N08/3404809400/in/set-72157616212394684/
This cat probably got calico + brown tiger, so she still has the stripes. I've heard these called Torbico, but only by some very... involved cat breeders.

Actually, that's not how it works. Both calico and tortoiseshell are caused by the same basic gene combination. The gene in question is located on the X-chromosome and consists of what are called "co-dominant" alleles, which means that neither is recessive to the other. The location of the color gene on the X-chromosome explains why male cats are almost never calico/tortoiseshell colored (those rare calico males usually have an extra X-chromosome, making them XXY, and are usually sterile). The two colors that result from the gene on the X-chromosome are black (X(b)) and orange (X(o)). A female cat that inherits a X(b) and a X(o) will end up being either calico or tortoiseshell, depending on the presence of the spotting gene, which adds white patches to the coat.

As with all mammals which possess two X-chromosomes (females and the aforementioned XXY males), the cells of cats undergo a process during very early embryonic development called X-inactivation. During this process, one or the other X-chromosome in each cell will "turn on" or "turn off" at random. As the embryo develops further and the melanocytes (in which the pigment genes are expressed) migrate to the surface of the skin, the results of the X-inactivation are seen with the mottled and intermingled colors of the tortoiseshell coat pattern.

The addition of the spotting gene further complicates matters. White patches occur on the body because the spotting gene causes a delay of the migration of melanocytes to the surface of the skin. In extreme cases, none of the melanocytes make it to the skin surface, which causes a completely white-coated (non-albino) animal. In most cases, some melanocytes will make it to the skin, though the amount of white on the cat corresponds with how "delayed" the melanocytes will be. The more delayed the melanocytes are in getting to the surface of the skin, the less intermingling of the two colors occurs. Calico cats with very small amounts of white will show more intermingling (or "brindling") of the colors in their coat, while calicos with larger amounts of white in their coat will have more and more clearly defined spots of coloration, with less intermingling of the colors.

 

[Nancy]

I've always heard if they have any white on them regardless how small, they are calico. Tortoiseshell's have no white at all. Dilute calico's are calico's with pale colours.

I get people all the time that won't fill out or only half fill out my adoption questionnaire. I had a woman recently wanting a baby and to come visit but would never fill out the questionnaire so I'm not wasting my time. I also get people who will delete certain questions. As if I'm not going to notice they deleted the one that asks what heating they will be using. lol

 

[Riven]

LOL, hmmm... we'll just delete this one... and this is one.. yup, here it is all done! ---->

Full Name - Joe
Address - Chicago
Inquiry - Would like new pet



Looks like it's all filled out to me!

 

[Essentia]

That seriously resembles about half the applications I receive back....

 

[Bethany]

I snuck my cats in on my fiancé (now husband) but I tend to do that a lot and he deals with it. To be fair he said I could adopt a cat and the one I wanted had to go w/ her old mate (they are both altered now).

Honestly, I didn't fill out an adoption application or answer questions prior and I did adopt from a rescue group. I did include that information when I inquired by email about them.

Once I picked them up I did have to sign a contract saying that they would not be used for research, that I would give them vet care, and that in the event I couldn't keep them I would return them.

These are mine, and jazzy is a tortoiseshell: