What is with all the breakups lately?

[3CsMommy]

Well, there went 2.5 years. :err: He's citing irreconcilable differences, and honestly I can't argue. As hard as I've tried, we just don't work. It happens.

But now, I'm kind of stuck. See, I live in 'his' apartment. I moved in to get a job b/c my area was so empty, and the minimum wage in PA is higher than Ohio. Then I got pregnant and it turned out to be tubal. So there's a couple thousand in medical bills. Next came a surprise ****y lump, thankfully benign, also expensive. Then, I found out we have an STD. You guessed it, dr. bills for that too. I'm lucky to bring home $200 a week from the job I moved over 50 miles to get, have no car, and very few housing options within walking distance/on the bus line.

Our other issue is the chinchillas. We've found out that one of them comes from a line of fur chewers, which would explain the patches taken out of the other one's backside. The plan is to split the chins up, so whatever housing I might find I'd want to be pet-friendly. I've got a couple of friends that might be able to take us in, but then I'd have to leave my job, and in this economy, that's a hard decision to make.

If anybody is the praying/happy thoughts/e-cookies type, I could use the support right now. :tissue:

 

[Stakie]

I really know how that is. I had abroke up with my fiance of 6 years just last year. I also lost EVERYTHING, my house,job car. Finding a job is rather hard, it's been a year for me. But I have been busy with things such as volunteering and such. Thankfully I have a parent that can still support me.

I really hope everything goes well for you. And hope you are feeling better. Being sick for ANYTHING sucks majorly.

 

[Parkerspetchins]

I wish you luck in finding a place to live, a better job, and happiness! It sounds like you have had it tough for a while and deserve a real break now. Hoping you get it soon.

 

[Jenn]

My goodness, you've had a lot of crap thrown your way...I am so sorry and wish you the best. Hopefully your ex will give you some time to find a path that works for you. And may it be a path that brings you the happiness you deserve.

 

[3CsMommy]

Thank you, everybody. I think I'm doing all right, but it's a comfort to know I'm not the first person to have to deal with this kind of thing.

What really stings is, even sitting here crying like I am, trying to figure out if I can get a decent job and where and if I can take my chinchilla with me, when I heard him come home for lunch, I was still happy to see him. But, there's supposed to be give and take in relationships, and I feel like I've been the only one compromising and trying to better myself. I deserve better than that. He insists that we're just too different, that he can't compromise or learn to tolerate mood swings or how sad I've been. I think he just doesn't want to.

 

[Brandon]

I am hoping the rough times clear up for you.
Remember, after a storm there's always a rainbow.

 

[Leah]

I'm sorry all of this is happening to you. I heard a song on the radio the other day that made me immediately call and tell my sister about (she's going through a NASTY break up with her boyfriend of over 4 years who just one day decided she's not good enough for him..). It's called "The More Boys I Meet" by Carrie Underwood. Basically, she says the more boys she meets, the more she loves her dog... or your chins, in this case!

The bad times don't last forever.. just keep your head up and keep hope that there IS a decent guy out there for you who WILL treat you like you deserve.. you just gotta hang in there.*hugs*

 

[FiaSpice]

I understand you. If you saw my thread, my boyfriend called it quit after almost 9 years and a wedding prepared (by him) in a year. At least I have a job. I have a car, brand new that was bought (his decision) based on 2 incomes. Now I have a 2 bedroom appartment, with all the bills to pay and my car. Thankfully, I have the full support of my parents and my grandma. I wish you all the best and...:hug4:

 

[3CsMommy]

So now, he wants to try to work on us *and* himself with a therapist. Okay. Since I think we both would benefit from that, it looks like I *don't* need to give up my job and move in such a short time.

I feel badly about it, but I kind of want to keep a contingency plan ready for if/when this happens again. I'd have to make drastic changes in a hurry if/when he decides I need to move out again, and aside from being stressful, it seems disloyal.

I'm just... not sure I can trust him, after this, or if I should. But, if me sticking around means he'll get to a counselor, it'll also buy me some time to find a place if I need it. Maybe some good can come out of all of this.

 

[Dolyphinm]

The therapist could also help with the lack of trust. I wish you luck in all of this. I've been with my guy for 2 years and last night we had a major blow out...still together but I think we finally got everything out that had been boiling over in both of us.
My friend lives in an apartment building in Pittsburgh that allows cats so I am sure chins should be easy to get in. It also has all utilities paid for in your rent asides your tv/internet/phone stuff and I know its pretty cheap too. There is a lot of buses that go near by too. So if you need it I'll get the information for you. Definitely always better to be prepared for the worst but hope for the best.
Good luck.