I understand now....

[Shooper]

I used to think that some of the comments on here were pretty harsh and even felt bad for some people. Yesterday I was on another forum and someone posted a topic "So Happy". After reading how they were soooo happy that their chin finally started running in his ball.... I may have been a little harsh myself. It's amazing how you go into "save the chin mode" when you know a chin could be harmed. I explained the danger and refered to the ball as a "death ball"! Anyway, it's funny that I have have changed so much since joining! Thanks for changing me!!:thumbsup:

 

[Pikaia]

Hopefully that person takes your advice and stays away from the "death ball"!

I think that most of the "harshness" on this forum is from people asking questions, receiving good answers and then the people continue not to listen to experienced members. They are looking for the answer they want to hear instead of doing what is best for their chin.

I really value this forum and its advice! Sometimes you have to skip the pleasantries and tell it like it is! Although most members are quite sweet and helpful!

 

[ticklechin]

If the person wants advice on a situation and its given, then the person decides they don't like that answer and then say "My sister who is a breeder, brother who is a vet, Mother who was born with a chin in her hands, father who has bred chins for a 100 years does it that way, feeds them that, keeps them that way, lets them play that way" and just ignores the advice and gets nasty, then they deserve to get nailed, when they say "Thank you, I can't belive I did not kill my chin off by doing that", then there is no issue.

 

[Shooper]

I'm just glad I have learned enough from this forum to help others!

 

[mercynursie]

I'm very thankful to have a big knowledge base of chin owners/breeders literally at my fingertips.When I ask about something,I want to know that I'm getting experienced/tried and true information.Like with my Roo's feetsies,I don't like to medicate/treat unless there is a problem and the folks here gave honest upfront advice/suggestions.

 

[PetoftheDay]

It's always good to educate people when we can, and don't gently is best, but sometimes one needs to be a little more forceful. Hopefully just the phrase "death ball" will startle them enough into paying attention!

 

[caiti]

I do like how some people here will give you their opinion based on logic and don't taint it with being worried about offending anyone--just plain truth is always a good thing and you can't ever feel guilty for telling it.

But I do believe in tailoring how you communicate to people to optimize the effectiveness of your message. I think for some people, this may be the only way they will receive it. You might have to omit certain instinctual responses or try to be more compassionate than you would like to, but it does work at times when aggression (passive or active and regardless of whether there is a reasonable, correct argument hidden within it) does not. The social human mind usually doesn't work properly when faced with aggression.

Though, aggression can work if you're say, threatening a person for the sake of someone else's safety. Like when you threaten to call SPCA or do something that would be unpleasant for them if they don't change their ways. This can be very effective as well, but leaves the underlying problem unless you can monitor them and maintain that fear you initially put in them. It's like a cat that jumps on counters. It won't jump on them when you're there because you scare it off, but it'll jump on it the second you leave. But hey, at least it's not jumping up there most of the time and it's the only thing you can do since cats can't understand the argument that it gets the counter dirty and isn't safe. It's a rational argument, but isn't registered by the cat so all you can do is make sure it knows you are going to try to stop it when you're around. Yay for analogies.

 

[Luci]

One of the reasons we may come off as "harsh" is because first and foremost, we are looking after the well being of each chin/hedgie. If an owner is unwilling to take the advice, we often see them post with an emergency...which could've easily been prevented.
Sometimes some of the posts are more harsh than necessary though, and I definitely do not want anyone to feel discouraged from coming to this forum. But the truth stands: chin first, owners feelings second. People join for advice...and it has to be responsible advice, otherwise we havent done our job.

Glad that you can appreciate that now.

 

[LovinTheSmallAndFurry]

One of the reasons we may come off as "harsh" is because first and foremost, we are looking after the well being of each chin/hedgie. If an owner is unwilling to take the advice, we often see them post with an emergency...which could've easily been prevented.
Sometimes some of the posts are more harsh than necessary though, and I definitely do not want anyone to feel discouraged from coming to this forum. But the truth stands: chin first, owners feelings second. People join for advice...and it has to be responsible advice, otherwise we havent done our job.

Glad that you can appreciate that now.

In the case of an emergency, it's somewhat more understandable to me. And I see what many people mean about others ignoring their advice, then a dire situation or worse occurs, and they're posting later wishing things were different. But I agree wholeheartedly with "Sometimes some of the posts are more harsh than necessary." This goes hand in hand with Caiti's post, which I "third." Many people have said that this forum can be almost discouraging in nature, and sadly, sometimes I see their point.

The thing is, this is an internet forum--this is not a bunch of friends and family interacting in their own personal lives (that excludes those who are friends on here). If people don't take the advice given here, that sucks, but nothing can be done about it. No one can force anyone else to change their ways.....and getting one's own feelings/opinions caught up in said peoples' decisions seems very futile to me.

That being said, there is a lot of great, encouraging people here with equally great and encouraging information, and that is why I'm still here. I try to adopt the advice of friends wiser than me and, "Take what you like, and leave the rest."